Why men have it better - Shopping for a Man

Dear Reader,

Smiles asked for defense of men in the ancient discussion women vs men. And naturally, the internet provides plenty. Two classics are:

Why men have it better:

1. Our ass is never a factor in a job interview.
2. Our orgasms are real. Always.
3. Our last name stays put.
4. The garage is all ours.
5. Nobody secretly wonders whether we swallow.
6. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
7. We don't have to curl up next to a hairy ass every night.
8. Chocolate is just another snack.
9. We can be president.
10. We can wear a white shirt to a water park.
11. Foreplay is optional.
12. We never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.
13. Car mechanics tell us the truth.
14. We don't give a rat's ass whether someone notices our new haircut.
15. The world is our urinal.
16. Hot wax never comes near our pubic area.
17. Same work ... more pay.
18. Wrinkles add character.
19. We don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.
20. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
21. If we retain water, it's in a canteen.
22. People never glance at our chest when we're talking to them.
23. Princess Di's death was just another obituary.
24. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
25. Porn movies are designed with us in mind.
26. Not liking a person does not preclude having great sex with them.
27. Our pals can be trusted never to trap us with: "So, notice anything different?"

And my favorite:

28. One mood, all the time.

The other classic:

To help women find the right men, a department store was built. In the store women were allowed to pick one man.

The department store had five floors. On each floor the men were "better" than on the floor below.

There was a rule though:

Once a woman stepped out of the elevator, she had to pick a man from that floor. The elevator went up only. There was going back to a lower floor.

When women went to the first floor, a sign there read:

"The men on this floor have work and like children."

Going up one floor, the women saw a sign:

"The men on this floor have work, a high income, like children, and are quite attractive."

On the third floor women were greeted by:

"The men on this floor have work, a high income, like children, are quite attractive, and do household chores."

On the fourth floor, the sign said:

"The men on this floor have work, a high income, like children, are quite attractive, do household chores, and are good lovers."

When reaching the fifth floor, women were greeted by:

This department is empty. It exists only to show, that it is impossible to please a woman. Follow the exit signs to leave the store.

The department store was closed, since no woman ever got off the elevator before reaching the fifth floor.

Our ladies on diablog are totally different, of course.

Enjoy your weekend,
Engine Room